Category Archives: Starbucks

Starbucks… greener solutions?

A Starbucks in Soho seems to think they have found a solution to the problem of trash production:

Simply render your trashcan “closed” with a friendly smiley face for customer satisfaction and unwanted garbage will cease to accumulate.

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Filed under Food, Humor, NYC, Photography, Photos, Starbucks

The Morgan Spurlock of Starbucks

In response to Lemon Life‘s post on Mark Malkoff, a man who made an intriguing documentary about his epic quest to visit all 171 Starbucks stores in a day and consume part of something from every one of them. (Really? Really really? Yeah, I know.) Watch it on YouTube. (Note: This link will be posted straight to this page soon, for the moment… I think I broke Google.)

My comment to the post is as follows:

Mark Malkoff is definitely the Morgan Spurlock of Starbucks.

This is quite a feat just mathematically speaking; not only in terms of his travel time, but also in terms of his gargantuan caffeine intake. If there are 80-100mg of caffeine in the average espresso shot and around 600mg of caffeine in your system puts you at risk for heart failure, assuming the minimum amount after 7.5 shots of espresso he’d be considered at risk.

Also, considering that he’d had “8 espresso shots in the past 3 hours” at hour 7… that man must have the bladder and liver control of a G-d. I’m beyond amazed. Perhaps, this is the only time when the word “flabbergasted” can be used appropriately.

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Filed under Coffee, Film, NYC, Starbucks, Thoughts, YouTube

Be Kind to Your Barista

Or 5 Ways to Guarantee Your Barista Will Spit in Your Drink

As a former barista and a daily consumer of a $5 double soy latte (yeah, don’t judge), I thought it only fitting to give note to the industry (I repeat, Industry) I’d gladly give my all to preserve. Or maybe I’m just sick of douchebags. Some of these may be familiar to you, some of them we secretly roll our eyes at.

1. Ask for an iced capuccino. There’s no reason anybody needs their barista to make steaming hot foam so it can seep into their ice cubes and create a watery, luke-warm latte. Nobody, and I mean NO BODY, needs that.

2. Order a Caramel Macchiato. Not everywhere is a Starbucks. Don’t be surprised when you get a minuscule cup with your order. Yelling at your barista won’t help, because the Italians are right. What you have is espresso with caramel and a dollop of foam. What you want is called a Caramel Vanilla Latte, or occasionally a Caranilla.

3. Don’t tip. Baristas are paid close to if not exactly minimum wage under the assumption that they will garner extra income from tips. Guess what happens if nobody tips because they think they only have to in restaurants? Unless you can make your Iced Mocha Frappe at home, throw a few extra coins in the jar. That clinky shit adds up nicely at the end of the day.

4. Order a non-fat, sugar-free latte with whipped cream. I don’t even need to explain this one.

5. Complain about the speed of your service. Especially when there’s a line out the door. Believe me, they want to go “as fast as they fucking can,” too. You can chill for two seconds for your luke-warm, non-fat, latte with whip.

Thank you to all of those who already know this. I’d love to be preaching to the choir. Now, a recipe:

Nutella Coffee– something to spice up your morning cup.

  • Brew a pot of coffee.
  • Place a scoop of chocolate ice cream in the bottom of a cup.
  • Pour coffee over ice cream almost to the top of the cup.
  • Add a shot of hazelnut syrup.
  • Stir.
  • Enjoy nirvana.

With that, have a blissful day.

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Filed under Coffee, Nutella, Starbucks